15 replies to this topic

[Jimbean]

[Gilly]

This is fucking with my world. I think my ideas, and many general conceptions, of SLEs need to be revised...

[Golden]

How does this differ from what you thought, Gilly?

[Gilly]

Well for one, the Ne role description fit to a T. I just started a new job, and every second I am working I continually notice things that could be set up more efficiently or things that could be done much better with minimal effort, but for one my coworkers don't like me and I don't want to dig myself in deeper by being any more of a "show off" than they already perceive me to be, which I am, to some extent, but it's not like I go out of my way; I just like doing things well, and other people get all fitzy about it because they don't like getting shown up by the "new guy." For two, I sometimes feel uncomfortable going up the chain of command as a new person, because I haven't been established yet as someone who is reliable or particularly skilled, which pisses me off, because I have certainly demonstrated that I am; new or not, I do my job better and faster than anyone I've met yet.

Basically they should pay me as a consultant to optimize their shop, and then let me keep working there.

Also the piece about Ni seeking fits perfectly: I have a hard time keeping a long-term perspective on things, and I get moody when I'm not directly, physically working towards something I want to achieve because life is fucking short and every second wasted is dead and gone. This is partly why I suck at school: I am smart as shit, but I feel so retarded doing petty little assignments that have absolutely nothing to do with the reason I'm doing them, that I get unmotivated and just say "fuck it" and do something fun instead. I can't just jump through hoops; it makes me want to kill myself. Also my "inner situation," as they put it, is pathologically unstable: I have a very shadowy, vague self-concept, I am very image conscious, but I have a hard time deducing what people really think of me unless I know them well and they are very open and honest with me about what they see in me. My ideas about myself, my future, and everything in my life situation are always changing, from day to day, and it's only with a lot of intentional discipline and a focus on specific concrete goals that I can actually work towards something without getting frustrated and throwing everything into the wind.

[Golden]

Gilly, on 09 November 2010 - 11:11 AM, said:

Well for one, the Ne role description fit to a T. I just started a new job, and every second I am working I continually notice things that could be set up more efficiently or things that could be done much better with minimal effort, but for one my coworkers don't like me and I don't want to dig myself in deeper by being any more of a "show off" than they already perceive me to be, which I am, to some extent, but it's not like I go out of my way; I just like doing things well, and other people get all fitzy about it because they don't like getting shown up by the "new guy." For two, I sometimes feel uncomfortable going up the chain of command as a new person, because I haven't been established yet as someone who is reliable or particularly skilled, which pisses me off, because I have certainly demonstrated that I am; new or not, I do my job better and faster than anyone I've met yet.

Basically they should pay me as a consultant to optimize their shop, and then let me keep working there.

Also the piece about Ni seeking fits perfectly: I have a hard time keeping a long-term perspective on things, and I get moody when I'm not directly, physically working towards something I want to achieve because life is fucking short and every second wasted is dead and gone. This is partly why I suck at school: I am smart as shit, but I feel so retarded doing petty little assignments that have absolutely nothing to do with the reason I'm doing them, that I get unmotivated and just say "fuck it" and do something fun instead. I can't just jump through hoops; it makes me want to kill myself. Also my "inner situation," as they put it, is pathologically unstable: I have a very shadowy, vague self-concept, I am very image conscious, but I have a hard time deducing what people really think of me unless I know them well and they are very open and honest with me about what they see in me. My ideas about myself, my future, and everything in my life situation are always changing, from day to day, and it's only with a lot of intentional discipline and a focus on specific concrete goals that I can actually work towards something without getting frustrated and throwing everything into the wind.

Ah, so you're still reconsidering your type and find some items here that fit you. I dunno--the way you spin the SLE description in your own words already sounds like it's a couple of steps removed from SLE. But I'm just a noob, so what do I know?

[Gilly]

What about it sounds different to you?

[Golden]

Gilly, on 09 November 2010 - 12:42 PM, said:

What about it sounds different to you?

I guess that there's something about the particular way you take up these ideas in the first person that doesn't sound like the SLEs I'm currently investigating to understand "my dual" (as Maritsa is fond of saying) better.


First, just the fact that you're exploring the topic openly in a thread and wondering about yourself so "anyone" can read it--that doesn't seem so SLE. I guess an SLE could do that, but it would seem more "fuck it, who cares" or something, and it would be more buttressed and brash. The SLEs I'm dealing with barely use the word "I"! You sound frustrated, you sound uncertain in some ways, you reveal your "hand," you show your current and future possible weaknesses. In this post you embody drama, whereas the SLEs in question provoke it in others and then reap it ... somehow. Big difference.

(Or maybe my studies so far are earning me a big fat F.)

Here's your post in detail:

Quote

Well for one, the Ne role description fit to a T. I just started a new job, and every second I am working I continually notice things that could be set up more efficiently or things that could be done much better with minimal effort, but for one my coworkers don't like me [even if SLE knows this, he doesn't care; it's almost a requirement in order to get anything done rather than an obstacle] and I don't want to dig myself in deeper [SLE dug in deep? No, SLE stays on top.] by being any more of a "show off" [Eh, no. SLE can be a showoff, I guess, but I just don't think he would say this.] than they already perceive me to be, which I am, to some extent, but it's not like I go out of my way; I just like doing things well, [SLEs I know don't say this; it's a given that they do things well--they do them THE BEST.] and other people get all fitzy about it [Sounds kinda whiny here, which SLE doesn't sound. ] because they don't like getting shown up by the "new guy." For two, I sometimes feel uncomfortable [Never heard an SLE say he feels uncomfortable going up the chain of command.] going up the chain of command as a new person, because I haven't been established yet as someone who is reliable or particularly skilled, [The SLE simply IS reliable and skilled, and you had better realize it in an instant, period.] which pisses me off, because I have certainly demonstrated that I am; new or not, I do my job better and faster than anyone I've met yet.

Basically [Hm.] they should pay me as a consultant to optimize their shop, and then let me keep working there.[The SLE would not say "should" here; the SLE would figure out how to become that consultant.]


Also the piece about Ni seeking fits perfectly: I have a hard time keeping a long-term perspective on things, and I get moody when I'm not directly, physically working towards something I want to achieve because life is fucking short and every second wasted is dead and gone. This is partly why I suck at school: I am smart as shit, but I feel so retarded doing petty little assignments that have absolutely nothing to do with the reason I'm doing them, that I get unmotivated and just say "fuck it" and do something fun instead. I can't just jump through hoops; it makes me want to kill myself. [Drama! Within you! Revealed so readily!] Also my "inner situation," as they put it, is pathologically unstable: [Hm. Would an SLE admit this? The ones I know are all like, "I am sane. There's something wrong with YOU.] I have a very shadowy, vague self-concept, I am very image conscious, but I have a hard time deducing what people really think of me unless I know them well and they are very open and honest with me about what they see in me. My ideas about myself, my future, and everything in my life situation are always changing, from day to day, and it's only with a lot of intentional discipline and a focus on specific concrete goals that I can actually work towards something without getting frustrated and throwing everything into the wind. [I'm not here to say all SLEs are inherently big achievers or that their lives add up neatly, BUT ... you sound like your life is out of your control, and SLEs are all like, "No! I will control my destiny!"and they tell me, "No! You have to control your destiny!]

Anything useful in these observations? I think you sound more like me than you sound SLE.

[Gilly]

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First, just the fact that you're exploring the topic openly in a thread and wondering about yourself so "anyone" can read it--that doesn't seem so SLE. I guess an SLE could do that, but it would seem more "fuck it, who cares" or something, and it would be more buttressed and brash. The SLEs I'm dealing with barely use the word "I"! You sound frustrated, you sound uncertain in some ways, you reveal your "hand," you show your current and future possible weaknesses. In this post you embody drama, whereas the SLEs in question provoke it in others and then reap it ... somehow. Big difference.

Well I never used to do this kind of thing. When I first opened up the subject of my type, I was really defensive and kind of refused to say anything other than that I was obviously ILE because I related to some stuff, blah blah blah, and pretty much attacked anyone who questioned me

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Well for one, the Ne role description fit to a T. I just started a new job, and every second I am working I continually notice things that could be set up more efficiently or things that could be done much better with minimal effort, but for one my coworkers don't like me [even if SLE knows this, he doesn't care; it's almost a requirement in order to get anything done rather than an obstacle]

I don't particularly care The two that don't really like me are retarded hipsters. The ones I do actually like, also like me. The reason I mention it is because it makes it difficult for me to get people to take my ideas for improvement seriously.

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and I don't want to dig myself in deeper [SLE dug in deep? No, SLE stays on top.]

They aren't "on top" of me; I don't really let them affect me, I just sort of go on doing my thing. Not digging myself in deeper is part of trying to get on top

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by being any more of a "show off" [Eh, no. SLE can be a showoff, I guess, but I just don't think he would say this.]

I'm saying that's how I think they perceive me.

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than they already perceive me to be, which I am, to some extent, but it's not like I go out of my way; I just like doing things well, [SLEs I know don't say this; it's a given that they do things well--they do them THE BEST.]

Yeah that's basically what I said.

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and other people get all fitzy about it [Sounds kinda whiny here, which SLE doesn't sound. ]

I'm sure there are no whiny SLEs.

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because they don't like getting shown up by the "new guy." For two, I sometimes feel uncomfortable [Never heard an SLE say he feels uncomfortable going up the chain of command.]

I don't usually, and it's my natural inclination to just tell it like it is, but I don't exactly have everything going for me in this situation so I'm not going to push things.

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going up the chain of command as a new person, because I haven't been established yet as someone who is reliable or particularly skilled, [The SLE simply IS reliable and skilled, and you had better realize it in an instant, period.] which pisses me off, because I have certainly demonstrated that I am; new or not, I do my job better and faster than anyone I've met yet.

That's my attitude too, lol, why do you think it pisses me off so badly that I get treated this way?

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Basically [Hm.] they should pay me as a consultant to optimize their shop, and then let me keep working there.[The SLE would not say "should" here; the SLE would figure out how to become that consultant.]

I actually told them the other day that I would manage the new store they are opening up

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. [Drama! Within you! Revealed so readily!]

saying that something pisses me off says nothing about my type.

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Also my "inner situation," as they put it, is pathologically unstable: [Hm. Would an SLE admit this? The ones I know are all like, "I am sane. There's something wrong with YOU.]

Well I do think I'm very sane, in the normal usage of the word, just in terms of having a fairly level head on my shoulders and pretty much always knowing the proper course of action. But, like it said in the video, I have pretty drastic mood fluctuations for pretty much no reason at all that is apparent to me, and I think it's largely due to my drastic inability to naturally take the things going on in my life into a broader perspective and integrate that into my internal experience.

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I have a very shadowy, vague self-concept, I am very image conscious, but I have a hard time deducing what people really think of me unless I know them well and they are very open and honest with me about what they see in me. My ideas about myself, my future, and everything in my life situation are always changing, from day to day, and it's only with a lot of intentional discipline and a focus on specific concrete goals that I can actually work towards something without getting frustrated and throwing everything into the wind. [I'm not here to say all SLEs are inherently big achievers or that their lives add up neatly, BUT ... you sound like your life is out of your control, and SLEs are all like, "No! I will control my destiny!"and they tell me, "No! You have to control your destiny!]

The only part of my life that is out of control is my internal life which is entirely the point of how I'm relating to the description of Ni seeking.

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Anything useful in these observations? I think you sound more like me than you sound SLE.

I guess I can see how I don't generally come across as being as confident as most people who are obviously SLE, but other than that you kind of put a spin on a bunch of the stuff I said, so, no, not really

[Golden]

That's all fine, and I wasn't saying anything meant to piss you off. There's just something in the way you're communicating that doesn't seem SLE to me. Aaaaaand, as I said, maybe I'm dead wrong. Your type is obviously for you to decide. I tried to give some specifics only to be helpful, but I felt a little uncomfortable with that undertaking given that it seems to mean generalizing about SLEs, who are certainly not all alike and are also not the all-powerful superhuman folk some of the canned descriptions make them out to be.


If you are SLE, which subtype do you think you are?

[Gilly]

You didn't piss me off...

Definitely Ti subtype. crazedrat suggested Se sub for me once, and strrrng has expressed that I am more like a p-sub Beta than a j-sub, but overall I can't see myself as THAT intensely Se. I have known and been friends with quite a few SLEs, and I am infinitely more like the Ti subs than the Se ones.

[Gilly]

Just curious, do you know your SLE's enneatype? That makes a big difference in a lot of cases; if he is more the 7/8 axis, then that would explain a lot, because I am a 3w4, meaning that I am going to be inherently more conscious of my self-image, people's opinions of me, etc, and also probably be more refined/inwardly focused, and less sort of gusty and blithe. You area 4, which is my wing, so relating to some of what I've said here isn't a stretch at all, especially considering that most of it is about dealing with people, although I doubt you would have some of the difficulties I tend to have with regards to people perceiving me as arrogant or aloof.

[Golden]

Gilly, on 10 November 2010 - 08:55 AM, said:

Just curious, do you know your SLE's enneatype? That makes a big difference in a lot of cases; if he is more the 7/8 axis, then that would explain a lot, because I am a 3w4, meaning that I am going to be inherently more conscious of my self-image, people's opinions of me, etc, and also probably be more refined/inwardly focused, and less sort of gusty and blithe. You area 4, which is my wing, so relating to some of what I've said here isn't a stretch at all, especially considering that most of it is about dealing with people, although I doubt you would have some of the difficulties I tend to have with regards to people perceiving me as arrogant or aloof.

Three SLEs under close consideration: two 8s and a 7, so far as I can tell. The 8s--one is classic 8, no question--are way different than the probable 7. So yeah, 3w4 would be more different still and, yes, would make me think you're more like me.

[mercutio]

Gilly, on 10 November 2010 - 08:52 AM, said:

You didn't piss me off...

Definitely Ti subtype. crazedrat suggested Se sub for me once, and strrrng has expressed that I am more like a p-sub Beta than a j-sub, but overall I can't see myself as THAT intensely Se. I have known and been friends with quite a few SLEs, and I am infinitely more like the Ti subs than the Se ones.

You're always fucking going on about yourself.

[mercutio]

Gilly, on 10 November 2010 - 08:55 AM, said:

Just curious, do you know your SLE's enneatype? That makes a big difference in a lot of cases; if he is more the 7/8 axis, then that would explain a lot, because I am a 3w4, meaning that I am going to be inherently more conscious of my self-image, people's opinions of me, etc, and also probably be more refined/inwardly focused, and less sort of gusty and blithe. You area 4, which is my wing, so relating to some of what I've said here isn't a stretch at all, especially considering that most of it is about dealing with people, although I doubt you would have some of the difficulties I tend to have with regards to people perceiving me as arrogant or aloof.

So you're saying he's a freak?

[mercutio]

Gilly, on 10 November 2010 - 08:52 AM, said:

You didn't piss me off...

Definitely Ti subtype. crazedrat suggested Se sub for me once, and strrrng has expressed that I am more like a p-sub Beta than a j-sub, but overall I can't see myself as THAT intensely Se. I have known and been friends with quite a few SLEs, and I am infinitely more like the Ti subs than the Se ones.

Look, how the fuck takes crazedrat or strrrng seriously. They're fucking INFPs. No-one listens to them.

Wake up to the real world. And stop trying to use other people to validate your pathetic existance.

[Gilly]

Thanks merky.