20 replies to this topic

[Unquietmind]

A Hypothetical Day of a Misanthropic INTj Collegiate

A few of the things he describes ring a bell. For example:

Quote

12:00pm--
With your first class finished, you head for the cafeteria dying for something to eat. You arrive and notice that the cafeteria is almost full and is very noisy, not to mention the line is too long. You decide it is better to starve than to enter such a hellish place. Outside, people are everywhere and there is constant commotion. You decide to seek refuge in the library.

I can't deal with crowds at all. I hang out in the library until the peak lunch hours are over.

Quote

12:21pm--
Someone arrives and, despite fifty other tables on the floor, decides to sit at the table adjacent to yours.

Hate. This. Although, I think this may be a pet peeve of introverts in general, as I've heard similar complaints/rants from many others.

Quote

2:11pm--
The instructor finally arrives, and the room becomes silent. Then, the instructor delivers some crushing words: "TODAY, WE ARE GOING TO GET INTO GROUPS AND DISCUSS OUR EMOTIONS TOWARDS OTHERS, AS WELL AS HOW WE FEEL ABOUT OURSELVES-- WHAT MAKES YOU LOVE, WHAT MAKES YOU SYMPATHIZE, WHAT MAKES YOU FEEL PITY? THEN, WE WILL EACH STAND UP IN FRONT OF THE CLASS AND LET EVERYONE KNOW WHAT WE DISCOVERED." You begin to tremble. Your mind fights for every possible way out, and, suddenly, you have hope. The instructor is reading the roll and not looking, so you make a quick dash for the door, making it out safely and unnoticed. A zero for the day was never worth so much.

I had a health class in high school that was like this... I ended up going out the window since it was on the first floor. People have contacted me through various channels with the sole purpose of teasing me about that, years later.

One thing that I think he wrongly attributes to INTjs would be his repeated homicidal thoughts. Generally I don't pay enough attention to people to despise individuals on that level. Repeated contact with a very, very annoying/stupid person just makes me tired and irritable; and I tend to disregard tact, so I'm sure you know how that turns out.

Anyone else?

[Oyy]

Reminds me so much of college and highschool. I always got there early to find a seat in the back and read until class started, or read in the halls if the classroom was still in use by the previous class. There was no better way to avoid the other people, but for some it didn't work. The comment about being quiet is one I've heard countless times and each time I wish I could smash in the face of the person who said it (unlike you, I do have the homicidal thoughts, but they were much worse in highschool).
I wouldn't go to the library, I'd sit in my car. I wouldn't have to worry about the passing disdainful looks or someone bothering me, I pretty much lived out of my car while I was in college.
Also there was no way that I was going to live in a dorm with someone I didn't know I did everthing I could to avoid that

[Unquietmind]

Oh I have them, just not very often anymore. High school, like you said, but I think I hated literally everyone back then.

And I had a roommate last year. It was absolute hell. The problem wasn't her so much as her absolutely AWFUL constituents - a group of pretentious, loud-mouthed, self-congratulating morons. Interacting with them was like being shat on, so I'm sure she thought I was strange with my insistence to shower three times a day. Once we established that we had very little in common sans being female, we barely interacted, and this bothered her. I had no problems with the arrangement.

Though, I had to take note of her observational skills, since she got me a small, deerskin-covered journal for Christmas. I don't celebrate holidays (whereas she's incredibly religious...) so this came way out of left field. I ended up making her an Easter basket in return, and felt really odd.

[Oyy]

I feel odd taking gifts from most people too...it's just awkward.

[Unquietmind]

Hm. Does it seem like other people are talking in all caps as well?

[Oyy]

Jadae, on Oct 9 2006, 02:41 PM, said:

I always want to say hi to these people but am afraid they'd nibbble my fingers off I say hi reguardless =p Who needs fingers anyways...

If I was feeling particularly bitchy I'd give you a eat-shit-and-die look (you see I'm trying to be invisible and when you talk to me, then you have penetrated by field of "go awayness"). But I got better about being nicer as I got older. Usually I would politely answer whatever questions they asked me as I tried to non-chalantly return to my book.
Some people were persistant in college though and no matter how cold I was to them, they'd always come back semester after semester and eventually I warmed up to them.

Your fingers would be safe Jadae (you need them to tend to your beautiful plants) because biting fingers is too intimate of an act.

[Gilligan]

Heh, I can definitely relate to some parts of this. Cute.

[reinstorm]

... So, how can one earn an INTj's friendship without having to hack into the school's database for their email?

[Capitalist Pig]

I can relate to that in more than a few ways myself. Especially the last part. Ewwww.

[Oyy]

raisonpure, on Oct 9 2006, 11:47 PM, said:

... So, how can one earn an INTj's friendship without having to hack into the school's database for their email?

Actually that would be quite scary

Most of the people I'm close to, it seems to have happened by miracle

[Unquietmind]

raisonpure, on Oct 10 2006, 12:47 AM, said:

... So, how can one earn an INTj's friendship without having to hack into the school's database for their email?

Someone did this to me... :/ Actually, they didn't have to hack. Our school has a freely-accessible list for easy stalking.

Hm. Most of my friendships came out of some activity, because it's somewhat easier for me to interact with people when we're all (allegedly) focused on a specific subject. It's easier for me to make friends online than IRL - in fact, I met my partner on a gaming forum, odd as that sounds. I've noticed I don't smile or laugh as much as most people when in a group, ( a lot of the time, I have no idea what's supposed to be funny...) and I think this can be very off-putting for some. The internet kind of eliminates this.

I think the only common denominator in all of my associations is that the individuals aren't stupid. It's not like I have any criteria other than that, really.

[Oyy]

Jadae, on Oct 10 2006, 11:19 AM, said:

I believe the massive laughter in a safe atmosphere (us two) always involved is good for him.

Good point, It's always more relaxing if everyone is laughing. I try to surround myself with humorous people.

[UDP]

raisonpure, on Oct 10 2006, 12:47 AM, said:

... So, how can one earn an INTj's friendship without having to hack into the school's database for their email?

My email is somewhat availible via a social network But I don't ever use it.
For the longest time, I have developed an aura of unnaproachability.... not in a direct way, because that is too obvious and people will approach you... but in a much more ellusive way.

I'm much more isolated than someone who projected the image of "oh, I'm isolated."




And as for the "lets discuss our inner emotions" stuff, well, that's pretty easy. I've learned how to say vague shallow things to appease people.


The hardest part will be figuring out where to go from where I am now. I think by acting more like a typical person of my type, instead of trying to pyschologically experiement with different MO will be a good thing - INTj is just the best way for me to go about things, it seems. Nevertheless, I've really amped up me to such a level that people don't know where I am coming from when I'm really explaining something, because I go directly to the core of the issue. I find that it's best to let other people bring it up, and say things very bluntly and simplistically at first. One word answers, etc. If they feel up for a deeper understanding, let them ask. Otherwise, just keep it to yourself and harbor that feeling of intellectual supriority, if you must.

That's my advice for now. And yes, I know you didn't ask for it.

If you really want to get bettter, INTjs, put yourself in a difficult situation with adequate time to brief and debreif yourself, especially the later.

[FDG]

It doesn't seem particularly hard to approach INTjs. You just go there, say hi, and start talking.

[Oyy]

FDG, on Oct 14 2006, 07:29 AM, said:

It doesn't seem particularly hard to approach INTjs. You just go there, say hi, and start talking.

No it's the getting them to talk back that most people have trouble with

[MysticSonic]

^Me.

[Oyy]

Guest, on Oct 29 2006, 01:00 AM, said:

I guess I'm an atypical INTj, as I relate to none of this; I'm so firmly jarred in my own perception of the world that I suppose such social situations don't irritate me as much as the next INTj.

Lucky

[Eldanen]

Quote

2:11pm--
The instructor finally arrives, and the room becomes silent. Then, the instructor delivers some crushing words: "TODAY, WE ARE GOING TO GET INTO GROUPS AND DISCUSS OUR EMOTIONS TOWARDS OTHERS, AS WELL AS HOW WE FEEL ABOUT OURSELVES-- WHAT MAKES YOU LOVE, WHAT MAKES YOU SYMPATHIZE, WHAT MAKES YOU FEEL PITY? THEN, WE WILL EACH STAND UP IN FRONT OF THE CLASS AND LET EVERYONE KNOW WHAT WE DISCOVERED." You begin to tremble. Your mind fights for every possible way out, and, suddenly, you have hope. The instructor is reading the roll and not looking, so you make a quick dash for the door, making it out safely and unnoticed. A zero for the day was never worth so much.

Grrr. You're not the only one. :/

[Huggy Bear]

Hey that true with my INTJ friend. But I'm like that too (maybe I'm an INTJ ). Usualy I go with my INTJ friend to a hallway or library last year.

[Ryene Astraelis]

Haven't read it recently, but I remember it to be amusing.